The one thing I ever did with all my heart,
The one weapon I’d spare for my life-or-death brawl,
The egg I’d never let fall,
But they spat on it and decided I’m not fit enough for all this after all,
I’m left wondering if dreams should be stopped by a panel of 2×4,
Was my vision flawed because it focused on the weakest links from which to build on?
Are the basics no longer consequential?
Was there just one perspective to view it from?
Was it objective or biased, who decided everything when the final moment dawned?
Am I to sit back and arrest the heartbreak for being wrong?
Lock it away and act like it hasn’t left me feeling lifeless and deeply torn?
Is there a point to all this pain, is it to make me gain when my mind was set on something now gone?
All these questions I mull endlessly upon,
Yet I have no answers to any of them and feel like my passion was misunderstood if not ignored,
My experience a non-factor, if not foregone…
Blood, sweat, tears,
Money, days, YEARS,
All for this moment, a different taste in my mouth from that I dreamed about and endeared,
It all feels far worse than weird,
My heart sunken, probably lost at sea or in an ocean charted only by Black Beard,
I don’t know what I could tell everyone else who believed in me, “flowery language” disappeared,
I’m articulate, but towards something else I’m apparently geared…
I’ll forever remember being a part of a beautiful place,
Two best friends, five countries and so many smiles it put on my face,
Which is why, despite everything, I will certainly remain,
Yours in perpetuity,
Evans Mbora Campbell.